29 November 2010 - 3:44AM - Denver, CO
Drum beats and artificial sounds pound into my ears at a constant rate, filling my mind with complex melodies and poetic lyrics. The juxtaposition of inorganic rhythm and organic lyricism strikes me as slightly odd; the words should match the sound, but most of the time they don't. I don't know what that says about my ability to chose good music - probably nothing at all. My so-called "refined" tastes have been shattered by extensive exposure to quite a bit of bad punk music (You must weed out all the bad eggs in order to find the ones made of gold, after all). Maybe the sole reason I listen to music now is to hear something raw in what's being sung, now how it's being sung. Does that make sense at all?
This past month has been a journey filled with blessing, heartbreak, and the constant refining of how I look at myself and the world around me. I met quite a few beautiful people - among them my newest, and so far most real friends I have ever had the pleasure to know: Thumbs and Emilie, who we named Stitches.
Thumbs turns 19 today. We've got an interesting history going already. His openness to who I am and what I stand for is refreshing, to say the least. He brought back that itch for traveling, though, which I never thought would happen again. After my last excursion, I thought I was done for good. I guess my love for the road can't be stamped out - just like my fire for writing will never be extinguished. The problem with the itch is that I can't scratch it until the summer, when my imprisonment in college is temporarily relieved for a few months' leisure time. I envy Thumbs - he has the wonderful privilege of traveling to Rwanda and the Philippines in this next semester. That's a traveler's dream in my book!
The worst part about knowing Thumbs? He's not in Denver anymore. He moved back to Misery - I mean, Missouri...and won't be back to Denver for awhile. A long while. I miss him and his crazy stoner antics already. He holds a small piece of my heart - which I never intended to give him in the first place, but our friendship is that close, and we've known each other for barely a month. Going from hanging out everyday for at least half the day since the night we met to a few texts and maybe a facebook message here and there is...difficult. I'm having a difficult time readjusting.
And then there's Stitches. Boy, that girl makes me smile. She's the kind of girl that you want to be friends with just because she's never NOT smiling. It's been the most wonderful experience getting to know her. She's coming back to Denver in a few days! I'm excited to see her. I've got a few of her things to give back to her anyway. Like a single sock, and a water bottle with stickers all over it.
Plus, when Stitches gets back, she's coming with me to get my nose pierced, and I get to help her knot her dreads up again. We've had some hilarious times sitting on the couches at Leela's talking quietly about God, the road, writing, and life, and dreading her hair. It kind of makes me miss my own hair - dreads would look pretty cool, wouldn't they?
Oh dear, it's 4am. I'm not tired in the slightest. I know I will be by the time 8 o'clock rolls around. I'm neglecting so much homework in favor of this website and my new zine designs. I'm just too excited about it. It's my connection to the road - my little outlet to vent my itchy frustration until I can finally pack my pack and scratch it come May.
In love and danger,