a place for zinesters - writers and readers
Reading: Infinite Jest
Listening to: Green Day's entire discography with a concentration on Insomniac and Warning
Drinking: clearance store-brand organic English Breakfast. It's not bad if you don't think about it.
Pondering: names, what project to undertake next, flyers, going to the fabric store at this point in the day...
I've been up since 8 which is a fucking record for me, but I had to take my friend home. I stopped at the 7-11 by his house on the way home and bought a really shitty cappuccino and drank most of it while I replied to emails and reblogged a lot of pictures of Doc Hammer on tumblr, then I was sleepy so I watched some shitty reality TV on youtube and passed out for an hour or so. After another HH dream (they're in my dreams! I got sideswiped by a cockatiel whilst balancing a newborn on my head! I missed their whole set! I was traumatized!) I was tempted to just roll over again and sleep some more but I realized I wanted to get maybe at least one thing done today so I dragged myself out of bed and begrudgingly ate about a pint of plain yogurt, cursed my existence, and made tea. It has been an insanely productive day, as you can see.
I was hoping to get the rest of this pile of back mail dealt with and maybe start on something, but that's looking more futile by the minute. It's only 2 but I feel like it's at least 530. I'm pooped. Let's talk about things!! :D!
So since early 2009 I've been doing zines (sometimes with other people, sometimes by myself) under the name Zinecore. I picked it in the idea that it would eventually evolve into a distro for like-minded kids in the Let's Scream About Our Feelings!!! Hot Topic 2004-10 scene, but that never happened because I can't get any of these kids interested in zines and it's frustrating as shit. So now it's just me. Which is cool, I like it, but I honestly just realized about a month ago that Zinecore Radio (podcast) exists, and they've been around since 2008. At the time I was completely disconnected from the "zine community", just doing my own thing in my small town, but now that I'm getting involved in it I'm wondering if this is maybe bad juju and I should change it, because I want to make a frickin' table banner thing and don't want to show up to a fest and have this really crappy awkward moment cuz they've been around longer and it looks like I ripped off their name. But at the same time, I just got the first issue of a friend's zine that has the same title as one that's been around for a few years, so obviously this sort of thing does happen and because zines are so undocumented and at times insular that maybe it's okay to accidentally roll with the same name? I dunno. Somebody back me up or tell me I'm full of shit, here.
I just mostly don't want to put all the effort into this banner thing and have it be like...endowed with bad vibes. I've contemplated working under the name Motor City Suicide Club (which I did google and it checks out clean!), which would be good cuz it gets away from the Zinecore dilemma and also helps to distance me from earlier (read: bad) work I'd done under that name, but then I don't know how that would be received in a fest situation where everybody's very much about being positive and having safer spaces and stuff. Again, can somebody weigh in on this?
The whole name thing is bugging me and creating a mental block from getting other decisions made too. (It's a terrible, destructive way my brain works, innit?) I have a whole list of projects I want to do on a whole variety of topics, but I don't have even working titles and I can't think of them because the other name situation. Eww. WHINE MOAR, AMIRITE?!
I want to do flyers to include in my orders too (thanks a ton to all the people that have made my mailbox become full of cash & well-wishes lately...it's amazeballs to come home and see that I'm the only tenant that got mail -u-) but I have no printer or name or idea or anything.
I know I say this a lot, but I'm supposed to be on a break right now! I'm not supposed to be worrying myself over zine stuff for a while!! But nope. I wrote in my notebook a few months ago "NEVER STOP CREATING. People love you when you're creating." and now I'm getting to the point where I'm freaking out because I'm not ankle-deep in some project for a few weeks. I'm seriously bummed cuz I'm not working on anything. But I do need a break from zines for a few weeks...maybe I should take the time to catch up on some of my fiction, maybe plan a chapbook of that or something.
Ahh, who am I kidding, I'm just gonna sit on the floor and eat pickles and stare at the wall till I get this name thing sorted.
Never stop haunting.